I LOVE HEADLAMPS!!

This is a true story, ask anyone here and I think they will all tell you that I am unusually attached to my headlamp. Seriously, I LOVE that thing, like I think if any future Kaleos were to ask me what the best purchase I made was I would answer my headlamp. It is the best, it is green and lovely and I use easily once a day, and sometimes I wear it just for fun.

Anyways, this week was good; it was once again time for class. Theology I with Jim Paulson was a long one. I don’t really remember learning but I do remember that Jim was really funny. He said some memorable things such as;

“The silence in the room is different than the silence in the room before lunch when I thought we were all dying”

“It ends bad for him… the lake of fire thing” (about the devil)

“I see that buzz in the room every time I say something moderately stupid”

“If I may elaborate on that, let me just say: ditto”

“Worse case, you’ll be a heretic, and I don’t want that for you and me”

“She really had it figured out, she’s dead now.”(About Mother Teresa)

Yeah those were a few of my favorites of the week, I am not sure if you will understand them, but take comfort in knowing that I pee a little from laughing so hard at these.

Youth, well youth, it is still interesting; I must confess I am struggling here. I don’t know how to talk to these young people. So I guess I would like prayer on talking with them, like five months with them and I still do not understanding how to form relationships with them, I just don’t know how. We played family feud after George talked about how God shapes us in the hard times. It was good but I still think there is something missing, I am not sure what it is though.

In the end it was a good week all around; I just loved on everybody. I have found myself impossibly happy these days and I do not know what to do, I am pretty much insane I think, like actually I am pretty sure that I might have over-dosed on happy pills or something. I am actually out of my mind. Well let me get this off my chest, I am in love, yes you heard me, ABBY CALVERLEY IS IN LOVE!! With all the Kaleo Seven students and interns and leaders!! And I am so grateful that God has brought me to the magical yet some-what mythical land. Not kidding, I have not experienced community like this before and I find myself slipping deeper and deeper into the wonderful feelings of joy and affection. This I must confess scares the crap out of me, because by allowing myself to feel this way about all these people opens me up to be hurt. However after talking with Kristie one night I found myself questioning what is so wrong about getting hurt, it means I cared in the first place and I think I would rather care and be hurt then not feel (been down that path and I don’t want to do it again). So here I am allowing myself to feel these wonderful feelings and I must say that it makes me feel light and happy, kind floaty, I imagine this is what no gravity would feel like. So I am going to love on these people until I’m all out of love and then I am going to love on them some more.

Anyways moving away from this little love fest, I am sure that those of you who read this often (my mother) have noticed that I have changed the name of my blog. Well I figured that this title was much more fitting for the time of my life that I am in and the things that are changing within me (take note of previous paragraphs). I am being forced out of my carefully placed coloring lines and into some new unknown areas (sometimes my headlamp lights the way but most of the time it is God providing the illumination) and sometimes I don’t know if these areas are even crayon safe, like what if the colors clash? But lets be honest pictures look nicer when there is a little bit of color that splashes into areas you think it would not belong.

Basically what I am saying is that it can be nice to be messy, especially if it is because I know God is getting in there and being messy with me and that He will always be there to help me clean. What an awesome God he is (I bet he appreciates it when we color outside the lines). So here is to a new adventure of exploring life in a not-so-comfortable-relaying-on-God-to keep-me-sane- and-safe kind of way (or maybe it would be good for me to lose a little sanity it makes life more interesting after all).

Stay Frosty You Ninja Turtles!!

ABBY